225: Overcoming Shame and Getting Real about Relationships

225: Overcoming Shame and Getting Real about Relationships

One of the biggest blocks to lasting intimacy is shame. Shame keeps us from being honest with ourselves, and our partners. And from truly owning what's real for us - what we actually want. In today's episode we're going to cover some of the many ways that shame gets in the way - and we'll also take a stand for what's possible when we allow ourselves to get real - about what's going right and what's going wrong - in our lives. Let's shine a light on the shadow - and free ourselves to be real with each other. And in the process we'll free up all kinds of energy to get closer to what we truly desire.

read more
224: What Romance Novels Teach Us about Real-Life Love and Desire - with Mara Wells

224: What Romance Novels Teach Us about Real-Life Love and Desire - with Mara Wells

Life doesn’t always lead to Happily Ever After (or Happily For Now) - like a romance novel. However, romance novels tap into something deep in our heart and psyche - keeping us turning the pages to see just how it’s all going to unfold. You can use the lessons from fiction to craft your own personal love adventure. This week we’re talking to Mara Wells, author of Cold Nose, Warm Heart - about the craft of romance writing, to learn what fuels our real-life desires. You’ll avoid the mistakes that not only would destroy a good plot line - but that also would send a perfectly good relationship down the tubes. And you’ll get some ideas for how to keep the passion flowing when you’ve moved past seduction - to doing each other’s laundry.

read more
223: How to Boost Your Oxytocin for a Sense of Wellbeing - Even If You're Solo - with Jessica Zager

223: How to Boost Your Oxytocin for a Sense of Wellbeing - Even If You're Solo - with Jessica Zager

Sometimes you just need simple strategies to give yourself a boost. In today’s episode, we’re going to cover ways that you can increase your sense of wellbeing and connectedness - by harnessing your own biochemistry to foster oxytocin production. This can all be done solo - no partner required (though you can do them with a partner too). Our guest, Dr. Jessica Zager, is a Pelvic Health Physical Therapist, and one of only 5 physical therapists in the world with an AASECT certification in sex counseling. Along with these simple oxytocin-boosting strategies, you’ll also learn a bit about how pelvic floor physical therapy can help with pain during sex. It’s a lighthearted conversation full of practical ways to keep you feeling good, and connected, that you can use whenever...but especially during these times of social distancing.

read more
222: Hints to Improve Digital Intimacy and Stay Sane (and Connected) during a Lockdown

222: Hints to Improve Digital Intimacy and Stay Sane (and Connected) during a Lockdown

Sometimes all it takes is a simple adjustment to create a much deeper connection with another person. Today I'll offer you some obvious-but-not-so-obvious ways to foster intimacy - whether you're cooped up with another, or connecting digitally. In this episode I'm also sharing some of the ways that I create deep presence when I'm using video chat to communicate. Strategies you can always use that will come in handy as we social distance to slow the coronavirus pandemic. Simple stuff, with big results.

read more
221: Love in the Time of Coronavirus - COVID19 and Relationships

221: Love in the Time of Coronavirus - COVID19 and Relationships

How is coronavirus (COVID-19) impacting you? What are the implications of "social distancing" on your relationship - especially if you're cooped up together for weeks at a time? Or if you're single, how can you still enjoy dating while staying safe? In this week's episode, you'll get some strategies for taking care of yourself amidst the epidemic, with practical advice for staying calm - connected - and HEALTHY - while we weather the storm...together. Plus a few (mostly relevant) thoughts on "Love in the Time of Cholera" by Gabriel Garcia Marquez. Sending so much love to you!

read more
220: Reclaiming (and Enjoying) Your Sexual Self - Taking Sexy Back with Alexandra Solomon

220: Reclaiming (and Enjoying) Your Sexual Self - Taking Sexy Back with Alexandra Solomon

What turns you on, and what turns you off? How do you get past the messages about sex that have been handed to you by others - to discover your own personal sexuality that emerges from within? How do you own your deepest desires - and then communicate them to your partner in a way that stands the best chance of having them be realized? In today’s episode, we’re having a return visit from Dr. Alexandra Solomon, author of the new book Taking Sexy Back: How to Own Your Sexuality and Create the Relationships You Want. Our conversation will help you take your intimacy to a whole new level, so that your relationships can be satisfying in and out of the bedroom.

read more
219: Your Questions Answered - More on Judgment and Grieving

219: Your Questions Answered - More on Judgment and Grieving

It can be easy to avoid being judgmental with people that aren't close to you, but what do you do when you feel yourself getting critical or testing the people with whom you're the most vulnerable? How do you shift from judging back to connection? How do you deal with the pain that you might uncover when you own the fears at the heart of being judgmental? And what are some realistic expectations to have around the process of grieving? In this week's episode I answer YOUR questions as a followup to a few of our earlier episodes.

read more
218: Sacred Instructions - Indigenous Wisdom for Your Relationship - with Sherri Mitchell

218: Sacred Instructions - Indigenous Wisdom for Your Relationship - with Sherri Mitchell

How do we heal ourselves, our relationships, and the world we live in - all at once? How has our society created rifts within us (and between us) that get in the way of fulfilling relationships? With indigenous wisdom that has been handed down over thousands of years, today’s guest will help you heal the splits in your life and develop deeper integrity. Her name is Sherri Mitchell, and she is the author of “Sacred Instructions: Indigenous Wisdom for Living Spirit-Based Change”. A member of the Penobscot Nation, Sherri has also been actively involved with indigenous rights and environmental justice for more than 25 years. Instead of turning a blind eye to the ways that our cultural legacy gets in the way of connection and healing, today we will walk together down a practical path of truth, healing, and spirit.

read more
217: How to Heal after a Breakup

217: How to Heal after a Breakup

1x
0:00
51:06
How do you heal after a breakup or divorce? Whether you’re going through a breakup now, have been through a breakup and still have some cleanup work to do, or...well...maybe you will be going through a breakup at some point in the future...this episode is for you. No matter which way you slice it - the ending of a relationship can be challenging. There are a lot of "right" ways to heal your heart - and some wrong ways. My goal is to keep you from making common post-breakup mistakes so that you don't make it any harder on yourself than it has to be - and we'll dispel some myths along the way.

read more
216: Steering Clear of Judging Yourself and Others

216: Steering Clear of Judging Yourself and Others

1x
0:00
42:32
Do you judge others or yourself harshly? How do you get past the judgment to a place where you can see a situation clearly, set appropriate boundaries, and change things for the better? In this week's episode, we're going to cover what to do when your occasionally judgmental nature gets in the way of positive connections with others - or yourself. You'll get some hints about what to do when others are judging you. And you'll discover the difference between being discerning and being judgmental.

read more

Latest Podcast Episode

0:00
0:00

Podcast Reviews

  • What a great listen!
    October 25, 2022 by Claribelleee from Philippines

    This show is so real and authentic! Love the chemistry of the hosts of the guests!

  • Great show!
    September 4, 2022 by Kingxxelo from United States

    I listen to this every time I’m struggling with something .

  • Yes!!
    March 7, 2022 by hair62 from United States

    I have been looking for a podcast like this for a long time I can’t thank you enough! Thanks again Erin’s

  • Amazing relationship advice whether being single or in a couple
    February 1, 2022 by JaninaCostaRica from Canada

    Hi Neil, you’re really interesting to listen to. I have been listening to your podcast for quite some time, and also went through a breakup while listening to your podcast. It was so moving and yet interesting to hear you going through your own breakup while doing the podcast. It taught me that breakups don’t have to be bad and that not all relationships can be healed. Thanks for what you do. Please keep the podcast coming 🙂 !

  • INSIGHTFUL!
    January 19, 2022 by Mitko I. from Bulgaria

    A ton of value, keep rocking!