193: How Mindfulness Can Ignite Passion – Buddha’s Bedroom with Cheryl Fraser

193: How Mindfulness Can Ignite Passion – Buddha’s Bedroom with Cheryl Fraser

<span style=”font-weight: 400;”>Remember that spark you had with your partner when you first met? Butterflies in your stomach. Constantly checking for a text message or call from them. Daydreaming about your next date. Well, how do you get that back after you’ve settled into a routine of work, home, dinner, dishes, mouthguard, sleep? How about after a year? Five years? Or even a decade? Today you’ll learn how to use mindfulness techniques rediscover what’s amazing about your partner. Today’s guest is Dr. Cheryl Fraser. Cheryl combines her knowledge of how the mind works from a psychological and Buddhist perspective with her mission to help people create sexy, passionate, playful relationships. She’s also the author of</span> <em><span style=”font-weight: 400;”>Buddha’s Bedroom: The Mindful Loving Path to Sexual Passion and Lifelong Intimacy</span></em><span style=”font-weight: 400;”>.</span>

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192: When Love Vanishes or Affairs Happen – What To Do? – Your Questions Answered

192: When Love Vanishes or Affairs Happen – What To Do? – Your Questions Answered

What do you do if your partner tells you that they don’t love you anymore – or, maybe, that they think they never actually loved you? What are your next steps if your partner had an affair? These are all varying degrees of “leaning out” of your relationship. So – how do you respond in a way that has the best chance of not only preserving your sanity and dignity – but also, potentially, re-igniting your relationship? In today’s episode I answer two listener questions and get to the heart of what to do, and how to get to the truth, in these situations.

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191: How It All Fits Together with Keith Witt

191: How It All Fits Together with Keith Witt

With so many different potential approaches to helping your relationship, how do you choose the one that’s right for you? And how do you make sense of them all together? John and Julie Gottman, Sue Johnson, Esther Perel, David Schnarch, Stan Tatkin, Ellyn Bader and Peter Pearson, Terry Real – they’re all describing different ways of getting the same thing – a loving, thriving, passionate relationship. Today we’re going to tackle how it all fits together, so you’re better prepared to steer your own relation-ship. To help us integrate in a way that makes it practical and clear, we’ve invited Dr. Keith Witt back to the show. Keith Witt is an integral psychologist, which gives him a unique perspective in making sense of all these roads that lead to Rome.

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190: How to Truly Be Yourself in Your Relationship

190: How to Truly Be Yourself in Your Relationship

Are you worried that your partner might not like you for who you truly are? And if you notice that you’ve been not entirely “you” in your relationship – how do you shift gears and create a context that supports more authenticity? Sometimes we discover something new about ourselves. Other times we knew all along that there were aspects that we’ve been hiding. Or we might act one way when we’re trying to attract our partner – only to then feel trapped into being that “super-enticing” version of ourselves…forever. In today’s episode, I show you exactly how to bridge the gap into truly being yourself – and how to invite your partner to be more authentic with you. In the end it will be a relief for both of you to be who you are – and to set yourself free from the shackles of society’s expectations!

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189: From Disconnection and Loneliness to Aliveness and Intimacy – AEDP for Couples with David Mars

189: From Disconnection and Loneliness to Aliveness and Intimacy – AEDP for Couples with David Mars

How do you actually heal old attachment wounds in partnership – so you can create passionate, secure attachment with your partner? Today you’ll learn how to connect with your partner powerfully, in the present moment, to rewire your brain, break unhealthy patterns, and find the joy and wonder that’s waiting for you just below the surface. Our guest today is Dr. David Mars, the creator of AEDP for Couples. He specializes in helping couples heal attachment wounds and traumas, find each other again in the present, and create a joyful, passionate vision for their future together. His work can help you if you’re in a new relationship, or if you’ve been with your partner for 30 years. David integrates more than 30 years of experience as a couples therapist with today’s cutting edge neuroscience – and you’ll see exactly how that allows you to get into really deep touch with your own experience, with your partner’s experience – and how to bridge the gap between you. I’m so excited for you to experience David Mars’s work, and to see how AEDP for Couples can offer you something new in how you show up in your relationship!

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188: Don’t Be A Victim of Attachment Theory

188: Don’t Be A Victim of Attachment Theory

We’re all talking about attachment style now, and how it relates to the way that we show up in relationship. It can be enlightening to learn about your attachment style, and to see how it plays out in your relationship. And…to see your partner’s attachment style – it can explain A LOT about how the two of you interact. But how do you avoid being victimized by your attachment style? Is there a way to get beyond the unhealthy ways that we related to each other and break the cycle? And, if you’re a securely attached person, how do you avoid being pulled into the potential challenges when your partner has an insecure attachment style? Of course you could write a book about this issue, but we’re going to cover some of the finer points on today’s episode.

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187: More Love Less Conflict – Communication and Mindset Secrets with Jonathan Robinson

187: More Love Less Conflict – Communication and Mindset Secrets with Jonathan Robinson

Have you ever wished that you and your partner could communicate better with one another and avoid conflict? Communication can feel very complex – but today we’re going to show you some very specific and practical exercises you can do with your partner that will improve your communication, mindset, and relationship satisfaction. This week, our guest is Jonathan Robinson, the author of many books including <em>More Love Less Conflict: A Communication Playbook for Couples</em>. Jonathan Robinson has worked with many couples and has been featured on TV and media – most notably he was on Oprah several times! By the end of this episode, you’ll have some new, practical ways to approach communication that will have an immediate impact on your experience in a relationship.

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185: 20 Minutes a Week to Relationship Bliss – with Alicia Muñoz

185: 20 Minutes a Week to Relationship Bliss – with Alicia Muñoz

What if you had a way to improve your relationship in just 20 minutes per week? Working on your relationship doesn’t have to be heavy and time-intensive. It does require time and attention – but today we’re going to show you how you can utilize simple strategies in just 20 minutes per week to make marked relationship improvements. This week, our guest is Alicia Muñoz. Alicia is the author of the new book No More Fighting: The Relationship Book for Couples: 20 Minutes a Week to a Stronger Relationship. Her work with couples, extensive training in Imago and AEDP, and research has helped her craft fast and effective strategies to overcome common relationship problems that you can do in just 20 minutes per week. After today’s episode, you’ll have a sense of how to improve the quality of your time with your partner – and worry less about the quantity.

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184: Forget the Love Languages – Let’s Talk about the Four Fear Languages

184: Forget the Love Languages – Let’s Talk about the Four Fear Languages

The Five Love Languages only tell part of the story. It’s just as important for you to understand the “Four Fear Languages” because they actually come into play all the time in your life – not only in your relationship, but also as you simply move through your day. And just like the Love Languages, the Four Fear Languages are universal – we all share them, but experience them in different ways. In today’s episode we’ll pick up where Gary Chapman left off, and you’ll discover how understanding your core fears, and your partner’s core fears, will help you create more love and connection in your relationship. And, most importantly, how to keep yourself and your relationship safe no matter which one of your Fear Languages is being spoken.

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Podcast Reviews

  • So informative
    April 10, 2019 by Pimpco555 from United States

    I have been impressed with this podcast for years, and have taken their class. Great guests, broad range of relationship styles explored, non-judgements, intelligent! What a grand gift to he world!!! Bravo!

  • Helpful and thoughtful relationship advice
    March 9, 2019 by Jcm451 from United States

    I have been married for over 10 years and I had my own counselor for a while. I have listened to two and half of these podcasts and they were so helpful in helping me think through my own commitment and approach to the marriage. I thought Neil brought up a good point about having your own counseling and how that can sometimes shift the focus from the relationship to just yourself. I felt my counselor did a great job but it wasn’t about my marriage it was more about me so I am happy to find these podcasts to help bring the focus back to my relationship. I am looking forward to you listening to more updates and I am grateful that Neil has created a series and is sharing it with the rest of us.

  • Relationship therapist in a podcast
    February 18, 2019 by Lee Zebra from United States

    I’ve been a frequent listener of this podcast for some time now, and am very grateful for it’s existence. The wisdom and knowledge this podcast holds for anyone who is trying to make sense of the complexities within relationships between self/other has helped me tremendously in terms of my own self awareness and the overall health of my relationship. Neil is an excellent host and interviewer, and has invited a wide array of experts to share their knowledge. I have gotten so much out of these podcasts and think it’s the best podcast out there in terms of relationship guidance.

  • Excellent
    December 24, 2018 by Silvvvvvvvvvv789 from United States

    Excellent material and great guests & topics. Thanks Neil for making this podcast for all of us! I appreciate it so much.

  • Very relevant and valuable but...
    September 11, 2018 by conan2280 from United States

    This podcast was recommended to me by my therapist. So far, I really like what I’ve heard and the topics have been very helpful to me. The one criticism I have and why I’m giving the podcast 4 stars is the occasional profanity requiring I have to allow explicit in my iPhone restrictions. I know many are ok with profanity and it makes it “real” for them, but for me, it is abrasive to the ears and I wouldn’t expect it in a great podcast like this.